Just looked at a list of 20 losses that Father Carroll, himself blind, wrote that we experience when we are going blind. Great. If we can’t think of every crappy thing about sight loss, we get reminded of a few we missed! (Although I suspect he is/was a very nice person!) [Lin/Linda: he was, he passed away in 1971.]
The one that struck me as a little ‘different’ from the others was loss of obscurity. Now, we know Greta Garbo wanted to be left alone and we know having the government or the neighbors know every, little thing about you is probably a bad thing, but what does this have to do with sight loss?
Some of us (who shall remain anonymous ?) are pretty good about putting ourselves out there. I, er they, don’t need or necessarily want to blend or fade into the woodwork. But what about those who are naturally retiring? People who don’t want any attention paid to them?
Vision loss makes you noticeable! Some of us can pass for sighted much of the time, but there are those of us who are just too different to do that. There we are: the elephants in the room whom everyone is trying to not stare at but whom everyone knows is there anyway.
When I first lost sight and could not drive, I sold my car to my yogini. We went to the notary public’s office to transfer the title. In the office, I was doing OK, all things considered. People did not ‘suspect’. However, a man guided a woman in dark glasses and carrying a white cane into the room and sat her down in a corner. EVERYONE noticed. She had no hope of obscurity. There was no fading into the woodwork for her.
Thinking about this, I remember some readers/members saying how they struggled with disclosing their vision loss. It dawned upon me what the fear may have been was losing obscurity. White canes and dark glasses do not allow for much lurking in the background.
I have no answers for these questions and I can find no handy dandy post to suggest a course of action. I guess that means just throwing them out and allowing each person to answer for her or himself.
Can one remain unnoticed when she has vision loss and, seemingly, the rest of the world does not? How much anonymity can be expected when you have a disability? Do low vision aids help you stand out or help you blend in? Do we have an obligation to make somewhat of a spectacle of ourselves so in the future disabilities such as vision loss are not seen as strange, but just part of the human condition? Does our right to anonymity outweigh the rights of others to be informed?
Like I said, no answers. None from me. Just questions. Share your thoughts. You can even be anonymous!
written August 14th, 2017
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