Technicians are not supposed to tell you what they are seeing on your testing. But if you are paying attention, you know. The banter gets less, the smiles are forced. You get told “good luck” as you leave the room. They don’t tell you but you know.
My ophthalmologist was somber. My retina photos from four months ago were up on the screen, my new ones were below them. What would have been a divot four months ago was now a crater on my retina. My macula looked as if it had been bombed. In my mind, it was catastrophic, sudden self-annihilation. My vision had gone from 20/50 to 20/125 in what I believed was two weeks time. This was my left eye. My right had lost ground but not as drastically. Just the same, for all intents and purposes I had become legally blind.
My macula looked as if it had been bombed. It appeared to be catastrophic, sudden self-annihilation. I was legally blind.
The obvious question was how the devil this could have happened. My ophthalmologist had seen it before, but only in the very old. He conceded I was too young for this to have happened but yet it did. He had no theories. Perhaps I should go back to Regillo. Maybe call the local agency for the blind.
He conceded I was too young for this to have happened but yet it did.
Not knowing why something has happened has never sat well with me. Here I was with questions and no answers and pretty much no way to get the answers. To use the Internet you pretty much have to be able to see.
I contacted a dear friend (who just happens to now be the editor of this website) and put her on the case. Findings were sparse at best. Some sources suggested maybe/perhaps high blood pressure had something to do with it. Most of the sources, however, had no theory at all. The general comment was it happens.
It just happens.
Written in February 2016. Updated September 2018.