Measure Twice and Cut Once

People are tough on themselves. Really tough. They are constantly passing judgments on themselves. I was not forceful enough, good-looking enough, smart enough. My worries are petty. I need to stop being so pitiful. I AM pitiful. I have seen this tendency to be self-critical in clients, comments, friends and myself.

One of the tenets of DBT is also a dialectic: people do the best they can, but they can do better. Huh? People do the best they can under the circumstances with the skill set they possess. They can do better and we can help them to do better by teaching them, by assisting in changing their circumstances and helping them to develop a better skill set.

AMD can really put a cramp in your style. I suspect most of us have always been pretty independent and competent. Now some of the simplest things are daunting.

Back to the post on stupid crap I have been doing. Well, I am still doing it. This week I got it into my head it was a new pay period. Last week’s hours were all by their lonesome on one sheet and this week’s hours were all by their lonesome on another sheet. That was not the way the business office wants it.

Stupid me! Right? Not exactly. Being judgmental and calling myself names is not going to solve the problem.

Being judgmental is a good way to get to anger, resentment and discouragement but it does not get you to a solution.

In this case I found one more area in which I had to resolve to do better. I had already put the ‘measure twice and cut once’ adage to work in other parts of my life. This was just another place I would have to remember to check and double-check.

And, yes, this living with vision loss is time consuming. It is getting a little better but every time I try to cut corners I make a mistake and have to spend more time correcting it.

Better to stop fussing about how slow I have become and do it right the first time.

(Either make a mistake or get a smartass comment. Yesterday I tried to read something posted on the wall without bothering to get out my magnifier. My boss told me I looked like I had been bad and been sent to stand with my nose against the wall! Thanks, boss. Sometimes smartass comments are affection in disguise.)

So, here I am. And I yam what I yam, just like Popeye. Negative judgment will do nothing but make me feel bad. I guess that leaves accept, adjust, move on. Sigh.

Next: THE LOW VISION TWO-STEP

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