macular degeneration, macular, diagnosis My Place in the World – My Macular Degeneration Journey/Journal

My Place in the World

Well, I got to my third job and I got home. It was a miracle of timing and cooperation. I was handed off like a baton in a relay race but I got there.

School was the exchange point this morning. A garage in that town was the exchange point on the way home. My boss from my third job was worried about just dropping me off. I was not worried. I was among friends and guaranteed any assistance I would have needed. If my second ride had not shown up they would have gotten me home.

Note to self…and everyone else: make sure you have a safe haven if you try this anywhere else. It was good to be sure the exchange points were somewhere I was known and would be safe.

It was good to see the guys at my old garage. It was also good to see the people at Chinese take-out over the weekend. I miss people it never dawned upon me I would miss. Makes me realize how many of my ‘casual contacts’ were actually very important to me and how AMD has in some ways impoverished me.

That realization makes me all the more determined to keep working and stay in life. I like my job and I am good at it. I can actually be a sensitive soul….albeit somewhat manipulative; I admit. I worked a client around yesterday. From reluctant and oppositional subject to active participant in her own assessment. I knew what I was doing and – if I say do myself – I did it with skill.

Although DBT does not like the word, I do believe there is something to be said for positive manipulation. That is actually what interpersonal effectiveness is even if they don’t like to say so.

I guess the point of that patting myself on the back routine is I still have skills. I can still use them and I still have a place in the world. I can still contribute. Hell, people even miss me when I am gone. There has to be something said for that.

So here be me. 6:45 in the morning and I am waiting for a ride to work. If you knew how much I dislike rolling out in the morning you would understand how out of character this is. But I am doing it. I am doing it because this is my way of maintaining a place in the world. I belong out there. Just ask the guys at the garage.

Next: Calendar Girl

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