Suck It Up, Buttercup

I try not to throw pity parties for myself. I really do. Some of the time things might not be great but I get by without a lot of feeling sorry for myself.

However, sometimes other people send out the pity party invitations and I am very tempted to attend.

What am I talking about? I was finished with exercise class and waiting for transportation. Again. A friend asked if I needed a ride. “No. I’m good.” And I waited…and waited…and waited. The instructor finished whatever instructors do after class and started for her car. Why was I still there? Was I sure I had a ride? She looked at me with such concern I wanted to cry.

I finally got home – five miles – an hour after class had ended. I got to eat at 8:30. God, this is a pain!!!!!!!!!

Since it is generally good to work through these things before they grow legs and run away with you, I decided to write a page. Self help, ya know?

I know none of you fine people ever feel sorry for yourselves, but bear with me while I work through this; OK?😋

I found a Psychology Today article from 2013. Russell Grieger, the author, seems to blend a bit of DBT (alright, so I see DBT in just about everything) with a bit of “suck it up, Buttercup!”   Grieger quotes George Bernard Shaw as saying “People always blame their circumstances for what they are. I don’t believe in circumstances. The people who get on in the world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want and if they can’t find them, they make them”.  Grieger divide people into two groups. To shorten what he said, these groups are the whiners and the responsible ones.

I don’t believe there are two groups. I feel there are two approaches and most people flip back and forth. Sometimes you have to utter a few “Really!?!? Are you KIDDING me?!?!”s before you can get back in the game.

Geiger does make some suggestions for not getting stuck in the whiners’ camp. Some of them are rather familiar. Pain is the human condition. What makes you think you are so special?  No, life is not fair. Shit happens and it happens to the nicest people. The corollary to that is “the bad guy does not always die at the end of the movie. Sometimes he gets the girl and rides off into the sunset.”

Then the much nicer ones. You are stronger than you think. You can chose not to let this dictate your life.

Geiger did not add these but I am going to. The reason I ride the #¢≠π~£! van is it is a means to a positive end for me. Without it I could not be out in the community doing my thing. I can suffer a bit if it gets me what I want. The second thought I had was “no mud, no lotus”. I like to think the adversity will make the a better person. Good things can come from adversity if it is faced with the proper attitude.

So there that is. Pep talk done. I guess I can “suck it up, Buttercup!” one more time. Shaw would be pleased.

written December 21, 2017

Next: coming soon!

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