Recently Lin told me about the “expect less” conversation that went on in the Facebook group. I can’t relate. [Linda/Lin: this is actually from a post where there was ‘advice for living’, and it included this phrase. It kept bothering me.]
Just like those people who tell me that they don’t expect anything and then when they get nothing they are not disappointed. I can’t relate there either.
I have lived my life aiming high. Often ridiculously, absurdly high. If I don’t get the grand prize, I often get a lesser one. That is still rewarding. Trying hard does not guarantee success but not trying almost always guarantees failure.
There are esoteric schools of thought – or at least we here in the West consider them to be esoteric – that say people possess “magnets” in themselves. The energy in these magnets attracts related energy in the Universe. Put positive energy out and you get positive back. Negate attracts negative.
Maybe, but I like Henry Ford’s take on all of this. To quote: “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t – you’re right.” We try and do and get pretty much exactly what we expect. Expect less and you try for less.
No thank you.
Now, there are those of you who are sitting there and saying I am wrong. You are saying there are things you can no longer do because of visual impairment. You are saying it makes sense to expect less because you cannot do or be what you used to do or be. Fair enough. But how about if we think about expecting things to be different rather than lessened? Different can still be full and good.
What can you still do? What do you now have time to try that you were not able to try before?
Visual impairment does not only close doors, it opens windows. Go get a ladder and climb on in!
Expecting things to go your way does not always work perfectly. There have been times that, try as I might, I could not attend an event or in general, get circumstances to conform to my wishes.
Oh well…some you win. Some you lose and some get rained out. But these failures were due to circumstances, not a failure of will. Trying my damnest and not succeeding due to the circumstances somehow sits better than not trying and settling for less just because…well, what? Because a visual handicap is supposed to somehow make life less ? Is that truly what you believe?
I am coming up on four years of being “legally blind”. My life is different. My life is not less. Almost daily I am amazed by the kindness of people around me. Almost every day I am amazed by the wealth of opportunities that present themselves. Quite frankly, if my life were any “more”, I could not keep up! Why do these people and opportunities come my way? I believe it is because I am open to them. I actively seek them out. I expect more, not less.
Circumstances change. Vision loss closes door. It also opens windows. Go get a ladder and climb on in!
Written December 23rd, 2019