I don’t want to say this too loudly – one should never tempt the Fates. You know they have a perverse sense of humor – but things are getting accomplished around here. I just nibble, nibble nibble. “Whoops! There goes another rubber tree!” (High Hopes starring Bing Crosby, 1959). Nibble nibble seems to eventually get the job done.
Because I absolutely ALWAYS overextend myself (a high school speech took off from Robert Browning’s “…a man’s reach should exceed his grasp or what is a heaven for?”), I have always nibble nibbled at a half dozen things at any one time. There is very little that did not get done by the deadline.
Bringing me to the topic for today: getting through when there are changes in life and things get a little overwhelming. Trust me. I don’t want to leave my school job and I REALLY don’t want to deal with all of the happy horse manure changes that come to life with vision loss. But when I look back, the last 64 years have been navigated pretty well. I have a track record of successes. I have done it before. Hey, I got this one, too.
I had a client today who graduated college in May of last year. Doing the ‘adult thing’ and it’s stressful for him. My client is very nostalgic for his college days.
From our perspective it seems a little silly to be nostalgic at the ripe old age of 22, but actually nostalgia is a good coping skill at any age. Personal nostalgia, according to Kristine Batcho in the June, 2017 theconversation.com, can be a stabilizing force. It reminds us we have a great storehouse of personal memories. These memories of the good times and positive relationships can be comforting in stressful times. Batcho reports she has found people who are able to be more nostalgic – remembering the good times – can use the power of those memories to cope with adversity. Remembering the positive relationships in your life may make you more apt to reach out for emotional support, advice and practical help.
In short, I have been cared for. I have been successful. This is just one more hurdle like every other hurdle I have surmounted. I got this.
Since recalling good memories is good for you, you would think I could find a ‘how to’ list on how to bring up these memories. I did not and I really did look and look and look. One thing the sources agreed on was bad memories fade and good ones endure so that should make it easier. One Wikipedia article said some researchers stimulate recall by using lists of cue words. You can make a list of words like fun, happy, success, sunshine and see what comes up. Another Wikipedia article said when it comes to recall, faces have an advantage so take out that yearbook and take a look. Then there are smells. They are closely linked to emotions and memory. What does that baking bread remind you of? The French fries cooking at the street fair? The cologne that woman is wearing? Cue up some positive memories for yourself.
Just one more little trick to try to make things go a little easier. Hope it helped. And remember, “I got this”.